The Importance of Honesty

I have become uncomfortable of talking about love and relationships. It has been long a time since I freely have expressed what I really think and feel about it. Most of the time, I choose to keep it to myself. I have fear of expressing it to everyone because that goes along with such a huge vulnerability that I cannot afford to offer the public. I am a private but public person. I love and treasure my privacy so much that anything of me that I don't want to shout out but gets openly expressed, for me, is a damaging thing. That is why I wrote this blog because no one will ever be able to tell who I am. And for those who wanted to know what I think and how I think about this matter called, "Love and Relationships", they won't find it out unless they find this and unless they know who I am. And by the way, that is close to impossibility!

The Importance of Honesty

I have trust issues. Past issues that still continue to haunt me now. The heartbreaking relationships I have had in the past, the repeatedly broken trust, the endlessly throwing of my heart away - all those things for some reason still remain. Whoever is special to my heart becomes a subject of my criticism. I assess them to the deepest of their bones. I test them. I try to get them to tell me the truth about everything if they don't. And whoever does not tell me the truth, I start to doubt about. I always make sure to say, "It is better to hurt me with the truth than comfort me with a lie." I'd like to be able to freely share with the person who has my heart and if he doesn't do the same, I only feel betrayed. That's why for me, it is VERY important to be very honest! To really tell the truth about everything. Our partner is our best friend - supposedly! If we don't tell them the truth about things then I think being best friends with that same person would be questionable. I know there are things that needs to be kept to avoid hurting the other. There are also things that were committed out of imperfections that needs to be buried away, forgotten and never ever again to be reminisced or even thought upon. Yet if you are going to keep things to yourself or just forget them, that would only be selfish - for me. We are supposed to share our burden with the person we have given our heart to and if we don't, once again, it would be questionable.

I don't know how to fully explain how it should work and why. I don't know all the answers as to why relationships are such a hard work and seems to have a lot of requirements that needs to be accomplished. But I think if you really want something to work, you will need to invest yourself in it. While you should not give your everything to that person before marriage, it is important to give parts of you that you know should be known to the other person before you both step onto the next level. You can't be engaged to someone you don't trust or doesn't trust you with the realities of your life. You can't fully trust someone who keeps hiding from you and you can't expect that person to fully trust you if you keep hiding stuff to yourself. Just as that one saying goes, "Do unto others what you would have others do unto you" - it's just not a phrase that people say but something that you can even find from the Bible. Nobody can argue the words of the Lord.

So for me, the importance of honesty is such a HUGE THING. If you think you can't be honest with that person I don't think it would be wise to stay. Otherwise, you would just be causing more hurt to that person and even give sin an entrance door to grow.